The I Inside

The I Inside (Roland Suso Richter) - D-

I haven't the slightest idea why this was in my Netflix queue. Maybe the freaky-time-traveling-mystery aspect drew me. Anyway, it's a complete embarrassment, without a single moment that doesn't ring glaringly false. This is the kind of movie that finds it necessary to do a Chinese zoom on an exit sign on a wall before its protagonist bolts for the door. Also the kind of movie that's fond of summarizing the preceding five minutes by having a character start sentences with "Let me get this straight: ..." Could have been interesting despite the stupid script had Richter established the hospital, where 95% of the action takes place and which becomes akin to a prison for the main character, as a distinctively spooky cinematic place, but it's just drab and ugly. As for the ending: I -- and probably you -- have seen this precise twist at least three times before. Maybe more.

The Dead Zone; Australia

The Dead Zone (David Cronenberg, 1983) - B+

Unlike Naked Lunch, below, there is nothing "Cronenbergian" at all about the subject matter here, but you can still feel the man's influence in the film's patience and intelligence (as well as the sudden appearance of matter-of-fact gruesomeness). Cronenberg's smart enough, for example, to let the movie develop without much of a plot, with a character arc instead of a story arc at its center; the resulting episodic feel makes it feel bigger, eerier (the application of Johnny's gifts ranges from the small and personal to the apocalyptic), and makes Johnny's journey from bitterness to resignation to embrace feel like precisely that: a journey. This is also one of the rare Stephen King movies to fully adopt the author's famous Maine setting, the haunting snowy backdrops perfectly complementing the slow-burn mood set by Cronenberg (though this isn't a "cold" movie -- there's a lot of green in the palette). And it's one of the few times Christopher Walken has gotten to be a straightforward protagonist. You may or may not be surprised to discover that he's a rather compelling leading man.

Australia (Baz Luhrmann, 2008) - C-

But for a moderately rousing 30-minute stretch halfway through, this would be enough to drive a man to drink, or possibly suicide. Three movies: a sweeping love story, a pseudohistorical drama about the Australian aboriginal "stolen generations" (see Rabbit-Proof Fence), and a standard-issue western with plucky cattle ranchers taking on a devious monopolist (the only part that remotely works). Really dire for the first 45 minutes or so, with Luhrmann's frantic, smirking, glaringly artificial style thoughtlessly plunked down in the middle of an Australian desert (the filmmaker, used to his elaborate soundstages, has no clue what to do with the vast barren expanses of his chosen setting); becomes more tolerable when it settles into a hard-to-resist underdog movie rhythm; goes to hell in the ugly, war-torn third act. Patronizing, saccharine, impossibly boring.

Naked Lunch; Bolt

Naked Lunch (David Cronenberg, 1991) - B-

This sort of pure metaphor isn't really my thing, but I do admire the fact that Cronenberg at least made an attempt to give it a somewhat coherent literal dimension. Essential for fans of the filmmaker since audio-visually it's probably the most Cronenbergian Cronenberg film ever, with characters constantly caressing fleshy typewriters and sucking addictive gooey liquids out of tubes protruding from the heads of buglike alien creatures. So there's that. Also: Peter Weller circa 1991 = James Woods + Daniel Craig.


Bolt (Byron Howard & Chris Williams, 2008) - C

You know, movies have been sending talking dogs and cats on cross-country adventures since time immemorial. Was it really necessary to contrive such a labored set-up to do so here? There's this TV show about a superhero dog, you see, but the dog actor thinks it's all real, and the producers of the show go to ridiculous lengths to maintain this impression, but then the producers decide that it's too predictable for the dog to save the day every time, so they end an episode with the dog's owner and sidekick captured by the show's villain, only the dog thinks it's all real, you see, and then the dog gets trapped in a box and shipped across the country, and now has to find his way back to his owner, who he thinks is in grave danger, but he thinks he has superpowers, you see... Complicated but largely charmless, and not very funny; the delusional hero thing is hard to pull off, and the movie doesn't make it work. I must say though that this is the best, most immersive use of 3-D that I've ever seen.

Quantum of Solace; Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa

Quantum of Solace (Marc Forster, 2008) - C

See here. Short version: If Bond films are going to be generic actioners, rather than trips to the familiar, idiosyncratic James Bond universe, they had better be good generic actioners. This one mostly sucks.


Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (Eric Darnell & Tom McGrath, 2008) C

A smartalecky chatterbox of a movie that's essentially a rapid-fire kidflick cliche remix. Some appealing weirdness -- the first appearance of studly hippo Moto-Moto is priceless -- but not enough of its predecessor's visual wit and originality; making the central plot a parody of The Lion King may have seemed like a funny idea, but the result is that at every turn the film recalls one of the greatest animated features of all time. It looks fucking amazing on IMAX though.

Synecdoche, New York

Synecdoche, New York (Charlie Kaufman, 2008) - C

Ho hum, another recursive autocritique from Charlie Kaufman, who is becoming like the rappers who rap almost entirely about their rapping. Kaufman is the successful but dissatisfied artist, endlessly searching for truth but being tripped up by artistic pretense and the limitations of his medium; ideas keep flowing but not adding up to anything; the rest of his life melds with his art. Starts out as a depressing absurdist comedy and turns into a disturbing, disorienting fever dream -- much like the way Kaufman sees his own life, I'm sure, or else just the Plight of the Artist. It would take a second viewing for me to really unpack this, but that seems unlikely; just because the movie comments on its self-indulgence doesn't make it any less self-indulgent. Kaufman seems to have withdrawn, his cleverness now focused toward pet themes rather than storytelling, and the opaqueness becomes increasingly irritating as we realize that he's not going to give us anything to latch onto here. Some amiably goofy gags (the house that's constantly on fire; Caden's present to his daughter), but probably not worth your time; depends on how much you're willing to humor Kaufman.

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (Mark Herman, 2008) - B

Even before the awful ending, I already thought this was one of the most horrifying movies about the Holocaust I've ever seen -- which is perverse, since it is largely about a German boy who seems never to be in any real danger. But his instinctive compassion and lack of comprehension is deeply moving, and watching the evil around him chip away at it is like being repeatedly punched in the gut. The movie is entirely unambitious and sometimes overwrought, but there's force in its simplicity: it made me physically ill. To some degree its formal banality might actually work to its advantage, since the contrast between its bland production values and its unflinching depiction of atrocity is jarring. On the other hand, the cruel, contrived irony of the last ten minutes is too much -- I was appropriately shocked that the movie Went There, but I didn't buy that it would happen like that, and it felt like the film was going out of its way to teach some of its characters a lesson. Still pretty powerful, and you haven't seen depressing until you've seen The Boy in the Striped Pajamas.

Ladder 49

Ladder 49 (Jay Russell, 2004) - C-

Wow -- I guess this can only be seen as an immediate post-9/11 artifact, when the (understandable and right) national reverence of firefighters would prompt this sort of dully worshipful, rudimentary love letter to the profession. Might have been (more) interesting had it tried to answer why people are driven to this extraordinarily dangerous job despite its toll on life and family, but it seems content with repeating that "saving people is worth it," which seems a tad reductive as insight into human motivation (and not even obviously true when "it" is a widow and several fatherless children). Formally, the film insists on the most boring version of Hollywood gloss, apt to undercut perfectly decent scenes by blaring a country song on the soundtrack, and prone to arty non sequiturs like segueing from a baptism to a water dripping on a trapped firefighter's forehead. There's a lot of firefighting action, but it's too expensive: the fancy crane shots and the lovingly observed explosions kill all immediacy, making the experience akin to watching theme park special effects. Some minor pleasures in the performances -- Phoenix is awfully good at these genial dullard roles, and it's fun to see Travolta as just a regular guy for once -- but I don't think it's possible to watch this in 2008 and not ask "why".

City of Ember

City of Ember (Gil Kenan, 2008) - B

Infuriating how people don't know a good thing when they see one. This is basically Lions for Lambs without the lecturing -- a movie about the immorality of "minding your own business" in the midst of a global crisis, an eloquent stance against complacency and blind faith. Thematically ambitious and working on several levels: the protagonists run into resistance that isn't political or even pragmatic but rather "it's not my job"; at the same time, the City at large is convinced that it is destined to thrive because it is "the only beacon of light in the darkness" -- shining city on a hill, anyone? Gil Kenan, who I am convinced is or will soon become a Burton-like visionary, folds all of this into a lovely fantasy adventure, fluid and immersive -- and also bold and abrupt when it needs to be, e.g. the opening shot and sequence. Loses it a teensy bit in the climax, which is a protracted and starts to look a bit chintzy (also, I'm still not sure what to make of Tim Robbins' bottle opener), but so the hell what. Hugely underrated.

catch-up

How to Lose Friends & Alienate People (Robert Wiede, 2008) - B-



Worth seeing for a bunch of disconnected reasons: a) Simon Pegg's hilarious physicality; b) the occasional bit of deadpan weirdness that had me rolling ("there are seven rooms"); c) dead-on supporting turns by Danny Huston, Max Minghella, Gillian Anderson, Jeff Bridges... even Kirsten Dunst, allowed to let loose a bit in an R-rated context, is more than just her usual adorable self. But Pegg's transformation from obnoxious boor to lovable scamp is less than convincing, and the whole romantic plot is a bit uneasy. Very funny though.

Quarantine (John Erick Dowdle, 2008) - B-



Okay, so the whole virus-that-makes-people-bite-one-another thing is clearly played, and this doesn't have the political subtext or technical virtuosity of, say, 28 Weeks Later to make up for it. The first-person stunt is also rapidly approaching "played" status, and creates myriad logistical problems. All that said, Quarantine provides enough decent visceral thrills for me to recommend it to horror junkies. Goes to hell in the last act, which is more hysterical than scary and resorts to infuriating exposition-by-newspaper-clipping, but even that doesn't kill the thing.

Eden Log (Franck Vestiel, 2008) - C



I like the story (i.e. what we get in the occasional bursts of exposition) and it's too bad that the movie constructed around it is so murky and boring. I've read the video game interpretation -- nearly-silent character wanders through levels dodging bad guys on his way to a big finale -- but it doesn't make the film any better, I'm afraid. Final shot verges on self-parody.

Blindness

Blindness (Fernando Meirelles, 2008) - C-

This has to be the most jury-rigged Lord of the Flies scenario ever devised. The government locks a bunch of newly blind people in a prison, with little food, no assistance, no sanitation, no communication with the outside world, and they descend into chaos and disorder? No kidding. And how, exactly, do things go downhill? Well, half of the quarantined suddenly become evil. Really? That's the great insight into human nature? By the time it turned out that the illness had just come to teach everyone a lesson -- LIVE AS A FAMILY, DAMN YOU! DON'T STEAL CARS! -- I was long past taking anything seriously. The interesting question that the movie doesn't remotely explore is why the fictional government react the way it does: just human selfishness? Or something else?

Miracle at St. Anna

Miracle at St. Anna (Spike Lee, 2008) - C-

No one runs hot and cold quite like Spike Lee. He can still make a good movie (Inside Man), or even a great one (25th Hour), but the time when he was able to tackle race head-on with a measure of nuance, restraint and moral complexity seems to have passed. This is sledgehammer stuff, preachy and obvious (black soldiers in World War II were mistreated and unappreciated, the end); he did seem to realize that he couldn't fill nearly three hours with outrage about this topic, so there's a whole bunch of general war movie stuff too, which is largely unremarkable. A few recognizable Spike Lee moments (most notably the montage involving the sultry German broadcaster trying to tempt black soldiers to lay down their weapons), and a few tense stretches, but mostly it's really freakin' tedious. Features Michael Ealy in one of the year's most irritating performances; on the other hand, having seen this and the surprisingly strong The Express, I'm very impressed with Omar Benson Miller.

The French Connection

The French Connection (William Friedkin, 1971) - A-

The quibble that knocked the grade down a notch for me: what self-respecting foreign drug dealer thinks that a good way to get the cops off your back is to get on the roof of a building with a rifle and try to snipe one of them down? Obviously a great procedural though, and when was the last time you saw cop characters who genuinely love their work -- live for it -- beating up junkies, tailing perps, chasing elevated trains, the works. Worth watching just for the little dance Doyle and Russo do after their wire comes through. The ending knocks everyone down a peg, of course, including us, but part of the reason it works so well is that the nitty-gritty of the police work is so exhilarating to begin with.

Righteous Kill

Righteous Kill (Jon Avnet, 2008) - D-

UNGGGGH! BLECH! This is the last Jon Avnet film I'll be watching. Such a narrative debacle that I can barely describe it; engages in whopping misdirection that makes everything before the "surprise" ending boring and suspense-free, and everything after it (and by extension before it) nonsensical. Someone please explain to me why the villain sits the hero down and has him make that recording, given what he does moments after? And what exactly was he trying to accomplish by beating up Carla Gugino? Ugly and poorly edited to boot, and Pacino becomes almost a caricature of himself. Astonishing that he and De Niro can't find better work than this, though I watched this right after seeing De Niro in Barry Levinson's relatively pleasurable What Just Happened, so who knows.

Hamlet 2

Hamlet 2 (Andrew Fleming, 2008) - B

Kept me on my toes for 90 minutes with an off-kilter style I could never quite pin down. Obviously intended as a parody of the Inspirational Teacher Movie, about a wacky theater instructor who bands together a bunch of (mostly gangsta) misfits and saves drama by putting on a show. But as parody, it steers a constantly intriguing middle-ground: Coogan's Dana Marschz (the "z" is NOT silent) is manifestly insane, but only some people seem to know that (it's never quite clear if his wife, played by a hilariously out of it Catherine Keener, is one of them); the movie launches a direct attack on some of the genre cliches (e.g. the parents who pull their kid out of drama class because he lives in a rough world where drama is useless) but takes others seriously. Not a model of tonal consistency, to be sure, but a) it's very funny, and b) it's actually kind of challenging if you're engaging with the film. Elizabeth Shue: best self-effacing cameo since John Malkovich.

The House Bunny

The House Bunny (Fred Wolf, 2008) - D+

In theory I could have rolled with the amiably cartoonish tone (a villain named Mrs. Hagstrom; a brothel soup joke; "I've got to meet that fucking bird!"), but the thing is so sloppy that rolling proved hard. Why is it that movies about misfits who try to be popular but learn it's okay to be misfits always make the misfits horrid caricatures instead of the types of people it's actually okay to be? (See also Sydney White.) Here I guess the message is a bit different since the characters learn moderation -- being neither the abominations they were at the beginning of the film nor the bimbos the title Playmate tried to make them (you can be beautiful AND brainy, see?) -- but that doesn't make the movie any less aggressively dumb; what purpose is served by making the "loser sorority" consist of a trailer park stereotype, a girl with a full-body brace, etc.? And come on, guys: if you're going to treat the hundred bullshit conflicts you introduce (Scheming Playboy Bunny! Unmailed envelopes! Realization that the Zetas have become what they hated!) so perfunctorily, why even bother? There are enough laughs to make it bearable (Anna Faris is very funny, and I really liked one joke in the climax), but I got the sense that the film's supposedly endearing gee-whiz stupidity wasn't an affectation. And how absurd to even pretend that the adorable Emma Stone is an unattractive outcast.